What I've been thinking and what I've been reading for you to compare notes.

Friday, May 11, 2007

Mothers Cast a Long Shadow

My mom died of cancer over half my life ago. (I'm 50 now, was 25 when she died.)Since this Sunday is Mother's Day I was just thinking about her.

Here's some things she taught me.

*If you learn to love to read you will never be bored. Mom always had books around herself and her children. She loved to read. When I think of her I often think of her with a book in her hand. It may have been the Bible or Christian book, or even a romance novel (I used to raz her about them) but she didn't waste much time as a couch potato.

*Love people and use things instead of loving things and using people. Mom wasn't materialistic. She was unselfish with what little she had in life. I guess it wasn't until after she died that I realized I caught the pleasure of enjoying life's simple things from her.

*Don't miss out on the joy of music! Mom used to play record albums at night when she put my two older brothers and me to bed when we were very young. She might play an album of Floyd Cramer playing the piano, or The Kingston Trio (dad used to have my brothers and me sing one of their songs), or even Elvis. She loved Elvis - his music AND his movies. I think she had us watch all of his flicks. After she became a follower of Christ she loved to go to Christian concerts - and I tagged along. She was transported to another dimension when she listened to gospel music.

*Don't ever be too busy to care about how people feel. As a guy I've got to admit that's been something I've had to work on through the years. Like the time I was a senior in high school and was leading the church youth choir. One night I came home after choir practice and complained to mom about a girl in the choir who was crying because she felt like she had no friends. She was messing up our rehearsal and I did nothing to try and address her problem. (Give me a break though - I was only 17.) Mom didn't believe in women preachers but when I got home and told her about my aggravation with the girl she laid a lengthy sermon on me about being more understanding when people (especially members of the feminine gender) were hurting. I still remember how that really mattered to my mother. So now it really matters to me.

*Be a man. Naturally I caught a lot of important stuff on this subject from my dad, but after he died when I was 15, mom had three sons to finish raising on her own - which was not an easy task! One night I had a charley horse in my thigh from playing tackle football in a vacant lot with my brothers, some cousins and some friends. I was up pacing the floor and complaining about how badly I was hurting. I must have been keeping everyone else awake because my mom got up out of bed and told me to "shut up and be a man!" No one heard another peep out of me after that! I always appreciated my mom saying that. She was working for very little wages to provide for three sons and I never once heard her complain. Least I could do was "suck it up."

If you are a mom never lose sight of the fact that you are one of the most important influences in your child's life!

According to a recently released survey by The Center for Media Research, 91% of tweens and 71% of teens say mom is the number one thing in their lives that makes them happy!


  • At Saturday, May 12, 2007 2:09:00 PM , Blogger Pastor Jeff Lawson said...

    I never met you mother, but I remember being with you as my pastor when she passed. I have been thinking of my mother alot this week as well. Knowing that they are waiting on the other side is much comfort...

  • At Thursday, May 15, 2008 3:52:00 AM , Blogger Kaveh said...

    I was shocked when I read your blog. I felt sad when I found out that you lost your mom because of cancer. Because that was the same way that I lost my mom. I'm happy for you because you're about 50 or something like that so maybe you've got used to it a little bit. I'm 30 and I've lost that angel one and half years ago. She was not just my mom she was my everything. The way that I found you blog was because of google. I'm a filmmaker and I have my first film in the 61st festival de cannes now and it's name is : "My mom has a long shadow". I was searching in google something with this topic and the first resault was your blog. Now I'm happy to know a person like you. and I'm sure that you still miss her a lot. So imagine my situation. Be a good hausband, be a good father, be a good grand father, AND still be a good son.


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